June 27, 2010

My husband Hugh, night #5, still in critical condition.

My Angels raised around $1200 from donations and sales at the yard sale today to help with my expenses. I keep saying the words "thank you" just don't seem enough. I think and hope now they know how grateful and in debt to them forever. I have the best friends a girl could ever have. I live in the most generous community anyone could ever live in. I have the most loving family anyone could ever want. I am just so very blessed and grateful for everyone.

Hugh remains in critical condition on this Saturday night, going on his 6th night into the hospital. Today, his fever rose, and the only way they are controlling it is with cold blanket thing that has water running in it, ice bags on his head and under his arms. They are still concerned with his lungs so full of fluid.

I am upset they are taking off his "amnesia" medicine, and reducing his pain medicine down a level. This is because they are trying to get him conscious now, to respond to "commands". My prayer tonight is he does these commands (like open his eyes, hold 2 fingers up, wiggle your toes), because if he does not, they are ordering a CT scan of his head tomorrow to rule out brain trauma/damage.

I stayed late until 10:00 pm or so, to see if I can help rouse him with my voice. He seems to respond to my voice (slightly) by wincing his eyes, or raising his eyebrows, like he was trying.

Samantha is having a hard time. She goes into the room to seem him, but within 20 seconds she is crying and it's too traumatic for her. I am not going to force her to go in there until she's more ready. It's just too hard for her.

My Mom drove me home tonight, which is a blessing because I can't tolerate the drive home alone from the hospital going home to no Hugh. I stay up as late as possible because I dread facing the bed alone. I am going to sleep on the sofa tonight in one of his tshirts for comfort. However, the sofa hurts my back. So I don't know.

Hugh, my darling, I know someday you will be reading this. I miss you terribly. I am so lonely and afraid. I am so scared right now. Hugh, tonight I told Melissa, while she was eating Panda Express, that I told her, that was our Saturday night dinner you and I always had. Tomorrow morning will be hard for me darling. Sunday morning is our brunch out morning, instead, I will be up at the hospital with you my sweetheart. Hugh, I love you. I want you home. I don't know how much longer I can take this without you home. It's killing me.

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